Bear News Beartown News

FEBRUARY 1, 2008



A New Yorker was on vacation hiking through the mountains of Vermont near Beartown  when he came upon the tiniest cabin he had ever seen in his life. Intrigued, he went up and knocked on the door. "Anybody home?" he asked.
 "Yep," came a kid's voice through the door.
 "Is your father there?" asked the tourist.
 "Pa? Nope, he left before Ma came in," said the kid.
 "Well, is your! mother there?" persisted the tourist.
 "Ma? Nope, she left just before I got here," said the kid.
 "But," protested the Yankee, "are you never together as a family?"
 "Sure, but not here," said the kid through the door. "This is the outhouse!"



 To all my friends who enjoy a glass of wine...and those who don't-- As Ben Franklin said, in wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink one liter of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than one kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. coli), the bacteria found in feces. In other words, we are consuming one kilo of poop. However, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine and beer (or tequila, rum, whiskey, or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting. Remember: Water equals poop, and wine equals health. Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of shit. There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service for all my friends......



Simplicity is the highest perfection of cooking, especially of game, and all other seasoning, sauces and accompaniments should be subordinate to the flavor of the meat.


Roast venison is best to be thoroughly larded, using half a pound of pork to a leg or saddle weighing 8 to 10 pounds.  Trim to a good shape.  Roast in a hot oven, basting at the end of the first 5 minutes and every 15 minutes after.  It is nice to use claret along with the pan drippings.  An hour and a quarter will cook it very rare; for more people an hour and 3/4 will be real fine.
Make a good gravy from the drippings in the pan, adding stock made from the bits of meat trimmed away before roasting.
From Gourmet Style Road Kill Cooking by Jeff Eberbaugh

4 Religious Truths

1.  Muslims do not recognize Jews as God's chosen people.
2.   Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.
Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian world.
Baptists do not recognize each other at Hooters.


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