DECEMBER 1, 2001
Constable Constantly on the Lookout for Terrorists
unually warm November day, the Beartown Constable pulled
over a local farmer, who was hurrying to church, for
speeding. The Constable proceeded to lecture the slightly
deaf farmer about his excessive speed and the danger to
all other Beartown residents. As the Constable was
writing out the ticket he kept swatting at the flies that
were buzzing around his head.
SEE YOU IN JAIL???
ALERT!!! Be aware of Vermont's April 1917 TREASON LAW
"A person, who, without permission of lawful authority, while the US is at war or threatened with war, makes or attempts to make, or has in his possession or attempts to obtain, or aids another to obtain, any map, drawing, plan, model, description, or picture of any military camp, fort, armory, arsenal or building in which munitions of war are stored, or of any bridge, road, canal, dockyard, telephone or telegraph line or equipment, wireless station or equipment, railway or property of any corporation subject to the supervision of the Public Service Board, or of any municipality or part thereof, shall be imprisioned not more than 10 years."
Do you have any pictures of roads, bridges, canals, military camps, railroads, telephone poles, buses, trains, telephone company, cable TV, or power company trucks? You'd best be DESTROYING them immediately if not sooner!!!
The Beartown News Editor was recently
contacted about using humorous content that was "invented"
by others. After extensive research it was learned that
words cannot be copyrighted; only their arrangement.
HUMOR IS IN THE EYE OF THE BEHOLDER
JUST PASSIN' THROUGH
a horse and buggy were observed in the downtown section
At 7:28 AM,
Saturday Nov. 24, the 911 dispatcher received a call from
an excited deer hunter.
Due to the increasing numbers of lost midgets, their pictures will start being displayed on dairy cartons of HALF and HALF.
services were held on Monday, Nov. 26 for Myrtle Bumford,
96. She had been a longtime resident at the home of Sally
and Bill Caulkins.
Copyright 2000 Claude Dern, All Rights Reserved
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