Bear News Beartown News

JANUARY 1, 2001


"Don't tell me," said the Beartown Constable. "Let me guess. You just tried another of your disastrous attempts to woo a young lady and were shot down once again."
Bobby Pendel, the well known Beartown playboy, nodded glumly. "This time I was absolutely sure I had my story down pat. Yet something went wrong. I can't figure out what.
"You've heard of Alice Stork?" he asked. "Her grandfather sailed with Admiral Byrd and a cousin climbed Mt. Everest with the Eggler party. If you haven't combed icicles from your beard you don't rate with her.
"I took her to dinner Christmas eve, and it seemed a good time to relate my Artic Circle yarn," continued the youth. "I opened by commenting that I had once spent Christmas Eve in less comfortable surroundings.
"Then I told her about the morning Capt. Haupin and I were mushing back to the Navy's Artic Observation Weather Station. Suddenly Haupin fell and fractured his leg. Ten minutes later the stretch of ice we were crossing broke loose. We began to drift out to sea.
"I realized Haupin and I and the dogs would freeze to death unless I started a fire. Alas, we had used up all our matches. I got out a small magnifying glass from our instrument kit and, tearing off sheets from our reports, laid them on the steel instrument box. By focusing the sun's rays through the glass onto the paper, I started a hearty blaze.
"Fortunately, a Coast Guard cutter picked us up after 24 hours. The Captain said I was a hero."
"But not Alice Stork," said the Beartown Constable. "And no wonder she didn't believe your story."

How did the Constable know that Bobby Pendel's story was untrue? Check the next issue of Beartown News for the answer.

LAST ISSUE'S SOLUTION: Willie Napster could not have been dialing a Zh-6- phone number. There is no Z on the phone dial.


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