Bear News Beartown News

MARCH 1, 2000


A Public Service Announcement from the Beartown Department of Tourism

Editors note: The grizzly bear is not to be confused with our friendly black bears. This notice is only issued in case of the very unlikely visit by one of these unruly creatures. Our native black bears have always been very responsible in policing their own kind and there is no reason to expect this community effort not to continue.

In light of the rising frequency of human/grizzly bear conflicts in North America, the Beartown Tourism Department is advising hikers, hunters, and fishermen to take extra precautions and keep alert for bears while in the woods.
We advise outdoorsmen (and women) to wear noisy little bells on their clothing so as not to startle bears that aren't expecting them. We also advise outdoorspeople to carry pepper spray in case of an encounter with a grizzly bear.
It is also a good idea to watch out for signs of recent bear activity; for example, fresh bear droppings. Outdoorspeople should be able to recognize the difference between black bear* and grizzly bear** droppings.
*black bear droppings are small and contain lots of berries and squirrel fur.
**grizzly bear droppings have little bells in it and smells like pepper spray.


The Computer Department of Beartown Seminary has held many, many, many meetings in regard to what they believe is a truly Y2K problem. Thorough evaluation of Computers 101, Cyber Space 404, and Hacking 001 have found that the associated technology is changing faster than the courses can be taught. These programs are extremely important in this modern world of information and the course schedules have been rearanged in an attempt to keep up with the fantastic pace of the Y2K lifestyle. So as to not conflict with other also important curriculums the course schedules have been changed as follows starting on March 3. Strict adherance to these new times is mandated for obtaining credit. No excuses short of death will be accepted.

Computers 101 Fridays 9pm through Sunday 2pm
Cyber Space 404 Saturdays 6am through Sunday 8pm
Hacking 001 Saturdays 10am through Sunday 11pm
All classes will have twenty minute breaks on the hours divisable by 3

Beartown Seminary, Computer Department
1(800)829-8363 [1(800)UBYTEME]
phone hours 9 to 5, Mon - Fri


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