It is important for men to remember that as
women grow older it
becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of
housekeeping they did when they were younger.
When men
notice this, they should try not to yell.
Let me relate how I handle
the situation:
When I chucked my job and took early retirement a year ago, it
became necessary for Nancy to get a full-time job both for extra
income and for health insurance benefits that we need. She was
a trained lab tech when we met thirty some years ago and was
fortunate to land a job at the local medical center.
It was shortly after she started working at this job that
I noticed
that she was beginning to show her age. I usually get home
from
fishing or hunting just before she gets home from work. Although
she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says that she has
to rest for half an hour or so before she starts supper. I try not to
yell at her when this happens. Instead, I tell her to take her time.
I understand that she is not as young as she
used to be. I just tell
her to wake me when she finally does get supper on the table.
She used to wash and dry the dishes as soon as we finished eating.
It is now not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours
after supper. I do what I can by reminding her several times each
evening that they aren't cleaning themselves. I know she must
appreciates this, as it does seem to help her get them done before
she goes to bed.
Our washer and dryer are in the basement. When
she was younger,
Nancy used to be able to go up and down the stairs all day and not
get tired. Now that she is older she
seems to get tired so much more
quickly. Sometimes she says she just can't make another trip down
those steps. I don't make a big issue of this. As long as she
finishes
up the laundry the next evening I am willing to overlook it. Not only
that, but unless I need something ironed to wear to the Monday's lodge
meeting or to Wednesday's or Saturday's poker club or to Tuesday's
or Thursday's bowling or something like that, I will tell her to wait
until the next evening to do the ironing.
This gives her a little more time to do some of those odds and ends
things like shampooing the dog, vacuuming, dusting or washing our
cars. Also, if I have had a really good day fishing, this allows her
to
gut and scale the fish at a more leisurely pace.
Nancy is starting to complain a little
occasionally. Not often, mind
you, but just enough for me to take notice. For example, she will say
that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills
during
her lunch hour. In spite of her complaining,
I continue to try to offer
encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three
days.
That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that
missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any, if you
know what I mean.
When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she
needs more rest
periods than she used to have to take. A couple of weeks ago she
said she had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing
the yard.
I overlook comments like these because I realize it's just age
talking. In fact, I try to not embarrass her when
she needs these little extra rest
breaks. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of
freshly squeezed
lemonade and just sit for a while. Then I tell her that as long as
she
is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me and take
her
break by the hammock so she can talk with me until I fall asleep.
I could go on and on, but I think you know where I'm coming from. I
know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Nancy on a
daily basis. I'm not saying that the willingness to show this much
consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will
even
find it impossible. No one knows better than I
do how frustrating women
can become as they get older.
My purpose in writing this is simply to suggest that you make the
effort.
I realize that achieving the exemplary level of showing consideration
I
have attained is out of reach for the average man. However guys, even
if you just yell at your wife a little less often because of this
article, I will
consider that writing it was worthwhile.
Police Report:
This article was found next to the author's body
inside a stamped
envelope addressing to the "Male Chauvinist" magazine. The
cause of
death is still under investigation. The whereabouts of the wife
remains
unknown.
