Bear News Beartown News

JUNE 1, 2009

Somali cruise package departing from Sawakin in the Sudan, docking at Bagamoya in Tanzania.

I just received this from a Beartown travel agent and thought I'd send it along in case any of you are planning vacations at this time of year. The cost is a bit high, but seems well worth it, considering the value.  What is enlightening is that the cruise line is encouraging passengers to bring their own high-powered weapons.  However, if passengers don't have weapons, they can be rented from the cruise line.  There will be a master gunsmith on board, with reloading parties scheduled every afternoon.  The cruise lasts from 4-8 days. The ship will sail up and down the coast of  Somalia waiting for a hijack attack by pirates.
Here are some of the costs associated with the package:
         $800.00 per day per person, double occupancy.  Single supplements also available.
         M-16 (fully automatic): $25.00/day with ammo at $14.95 per100 rounds.
         AK-47: No charge.  100 rounds of ammo for $14.95
         Barrett M-107 .50 cal. sniper rifle: $55.00/day.  Ammo at 25 rounds for  $29.95
         Crew  members will double as spotters for $30.00 per hour (spotting scope included).
          RPG's at $75 each or $200 for 3 standard loads.
          Deck mounted mini-gun available @ $450.00 per 30 seconds of sustained  fire.
          Free complimentary night vision equipment.
          Meals not included, but reasonably priced. Fresh coffee and snacks on the top deck from 7 p.m. 'till 6 a.m. each night. 
          Group rates and corporate discounts offered with a money back guarantee if not fully satisfied.
Here's some text from the cruise offering:
"We guarantee that you will experience at least two hijacking attempts by pirates or we will refund one half your money, including gun rental charges and any unused ammo.  How can we guarantee you will experience a hijacking?  We  cruise at 5 knots within 12 miles of the coast of  Somalia .  If an attempted hijacking does not occur during the regularly scheduled cruise, we will turn the boat around and cruise the coast at 4 knots, lowering speed at each turning point as necessary.  Reserve your package before June 29th and get 100 rounds of free tracer ammo in the caliber of your choice." 
Here are a few testimonials:
"Fun for the whole family!" ---- Stan H. - -  Denver, CO
"Will be a cherished memory for years to come." ---- Robert J. - -  Butte, MT
"We took the wife's parents along to repay them for some of the happy times they have shared with us." ---- Tim W. - -  Boise, ID
"We are already planning a return trip later this year." Peter J. - - White Bear Lake, MN



Ever wonder what radio station the bears and humans of BEARTOWN listen to while on the internet? Why good old Country Music, of course, on none other than:
Click here for genuine real country.

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