Bear News Beartown News

JUNE 1, 2003

FISHING SEASON is HERE

When four fisherman get together, there's always a fifth

There is no use in your walking five miles to fish when you can depend on being just as unsuccessful near home!

Can cows tell you whether or not the fish are biting?
Some folks think so.  They claim that cattle graze actively at times when the fish are hungry, and that when cattle stop eating to rest, fish do too.  So check a pasture as you drive by.

Fish seem to have a 10 to 12 body lengths per second speed limit.  Big fish usually swim faster than small fish.

Fishing boats leak.
Fishing boat captains drink.
Any fish you lose is a big one.
Fishing was always better the day before you got there.
Though fishing is a very difficult sport, it can be mastered by any man or woman with average strength and inherited money

Fishing equipment size standards are as comprehensible as prayer in Latin.  A No. 14 hook is much smaller than a No. 8 hook.  But wait, anyone could figure that system out, so they complicated it.  When you get down to "1" they add a slash and a zero and then the hooks get bigger along with the numbers.

 

Ever wonder what radio station the bears and humans of BEARTOWN listen to while on the internet? Why good old Country Music, of course, on none other than: www.countrybear.com
Click here for genuine real country.
MISSION

The purpose of this paper is to report area news, and nothing but the news so help me God, unless I feel like doing something else, which I can do whether you like it or not because it is my paper. You can read it or not, just as you please. But remember, if you don't read an issue you don't know what your missing.

DID SOMEBODY SAY BEARTOWN
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EDITOR...Claude Dern

TYPESETTER...Claude Dern

JANITOR...Claude Dern

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