MARCH 1, 2001

Holly/Berry Wedding
&
Martin Farm Auction

Editors Note: Our cub reporter, Bruin DeBear, was given the assignment for this month's front page. He mixed up his notes and the following article resulted:

Adam Holly and Eve Berry are to be disposed of at public auction at my farm one mile north of a beautiful cluster of roses on her gown before a background of farm implements too numerous to mention in the presense of seventy guests including two milk cows, six mules, and one bobsled.

The pastor tied the nuptial knot with 18,000 feet of baled hay twine. The bride wore a dark blue frock of green crepe with a full set of hames and traces, carrying in her hand several good bales of alfalfa hay. Bridesmaids were two nice, fat Duroc hogs weighing about 300 pounds each. The groom, attended by a 2 & 1/2 year-old Herford bull, wore the conventional black. The bride entered upon the arm of her father, who was carrying a good double-barrel, 12 guage Remington shotgun now for sale cheap. The wedding march was played by a three horsepower gasoline engine on a good two-row corn planter with grass seed and corn drill plates. The bridal party left on one good John Deere tractor for an extended trip with terms to suit the purchaser. They will be home to their friends with one good baby buggy and a few other kitchen implements after date of sale to responsible parties and some fifty chickens.

Ever wonder what radio station the bears and humans of BEARTOWN listen to while on the internet? Why good old Country Music, of course, on none other than: www.countrybear.com Click here for genuine real country.

MISSION The purpose of this paper is to report area news, and nothing but the news so help me God, unless I feel like doing something else, which I can do whether you like it or not because it is my paper. You can read it or not, just as you please. But remember, if you don't read an issue you don't know what your missing. DID SOMEBODY SAY BEARTOWN ************ Sign Bruin DeBear's Guestbook View Bruin DeBear's Guestbook				STAFF EDITOR...Claude Dern TYPESETTER...Claude Dern JANITOR...Claude Dern CUB REPORTERS Ursus Americanus Bruin DeBear Perhaps Yourself Bruin's Den
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