JULY 1, 2007
John the farmer was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred young layers (hens), called "pullets", and ten roosters, whose job it was to fertilize the eggs (for you city folks). The farmer kept records and any rooster that didn't perform went into the soup pot and was replaced. That took an awful lot of his time, so he bought a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone so John could tell from a distance, which rooster was "performing". Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report simply by listening to the bells. The farmer's favorite rooster was old Butch, and a very fine specimen he was, too. But on this particular morning John noticed old Butch's bell hadn't rung at all! So, John went to investigate. The other roosters were chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover. But to Farmer John's amazement, old Butch had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring. He would sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one. John was so proud of old Butch, he entered him in the Renfrew County Fair and he became an overnight sensation among the judges. The result...The judges not only awarded old Butch the No Bell Piece Prize but they also awarded him the Pulletsurprise as well. Clearly old Butch was a politician in the making:
Who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention!!
For centuries, Hindu
women have worn a spot on their foreheads. We have
A fire fighter is working on the engine
outside the station when he notices a
little girl next door in a little red
wagon with little ladders hung off the
sides and a garden hose tightly coiled
in the Middle. The girl is wearing a
fire fighter's helmet. The wagon is
being pulled by her dog and her cat. The
fire fighter walked over to take a
I bought a 2007
Lexus and returned to the dealer the
next day complaining that I couldn't
figure out how the radio worked.
The salesman explained that the radio
was voice activated.
he said, "Nelson"!
Copyright 2000 Claude Dern, All Rights Reserved
This site hosted by VTweb.com