Some of you will recall that on July 8, 1947, a little over 60
years ago, a UFO with five
aliens aboard crashed onto a sheep and mule ranch just outside
New Mexico . This is a well known incident that many say has
long been covered up by the U.S. Air Force and other federal
agencies and organizations.
However, what you may NOT know is that in the month of April
1948, nine months after that historic day, the following
people were born:
Albert A. Gore, Jr..
John F. Kerry
William J. Clinton
Charles E. Schumer
See what happens when aliens breed with sheep and jackasses?
I certainly hope this bit of information clears up a lot of
things for you.
It did for me.
No wonder they support the bill to help illegal aliens!
Now You Know
DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas , and
talks with an old rancher named Warren.
tells the rancher,
"I need to inspect your
ranch for illegally grown drugs."
"Okay , but do not go in
field over there,"
as he points out the location.
The DEA officer verbally explodes saying,
"Mister, I have the authority of the Federal
Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removes
badge and proudly displays it to Warren.
badge means I am allowed to go wherever
wish. . . On any land. No questions asked or
answers given. Have I made myself clear?
Warren nods politely, apologizes, and goes about
chores at the ranch.
short time later, the old rancher hears loud
screams and sees the DEA officer running for
life chased close behind by the rancher's
every step the bull is gaining ground on the
officer, and it seems likely that he'll get gored
before he reaches safety. The officer is clearly
Warren throws down his tools, runs to the fence
yells at the top of his lungs. . .
Show him your
"Never look down on anyone unless you're
helping them up."
. . . Jesse Jackson
were 85 years old and had been married
for sixty years. Though they were far
from rich, they managed to get by
because they watched their pennies.
Though not young, they were both in
very good health, largely due to the
wife's insistence on healthy foods and
exercise for the last decade.
One day, their good health didn't help
when they went on a rare vacation and
their plane crashed, sending them off
They reached the pearly gates and St
Peter escorted them inside. He took
them to a beautiful mansion, furnished
in gold and fine silks, with a fully
stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the
master bathroom. A maid could be
seen, hanging up their favorite
clothes in the walk-in wardrobe.
They gasped in astonishment when he
"Welcome to Heaven. This will be your
The old man asked Peter how much all
this was going to cost. "Why,
St Peter replied,
is your reward in Heaven."
The old man looked out the window and
right there he saw a championship golf
course, finer and more beautiful than
any ever built on Earth...
the greens fees?",
grumbled the old man.
St Peter replied,
"you can play
for free, every day."
Next they went to the clubhouse and
saw the lavish buffet lunch, with
every imaginable cuisine laid out
before them, from seafood to steaks,
to exotic desserts, and free-flowing
drinks of every kind.
said St Peter to the man. "This
is Heaven, it's all free for you to
The old man looked around and glanced
nervously at his wife.
where are the low fat and low
cholesterol foods and the
the best part!"
St Peter replied.
"You can eat and
drink as much as you like of whatever
you like and you will never get fat or
sick. This is Heaven!"
The old man pushed,
"No gym to work
unless you want to,"
was the answer.
"No testing my
sugar or blood pressure or...."
again. All you do here is enjoy
The old man glared at his wife and
"You and your Bran Flakes. We could
have been here ten years ago!"
DID SOMEBODY SAY