An 18 year old
Italian girl tells her Mom that she has missed her period
for 2 months.
Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a
The test result indicates that the girl is pregnant.
Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, 'Who was the
pig that did this to you? I want to know!'
The girl picks up the phone and makes a call.
Half an hour later, a Ferrari stops in front of their
house. A mature and distinguished man with grey hair and
impeccably dressed in an Armani suit steps out of a
Ferrari and enters the house. He sits in the living room
with the father, mother, and the girl and tells them:
'Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the
problem. I can't marry her because of my personal family
situation but I will take charge.
I will pay all costs and provide for your daughter for the
rest of her life. Additionally, if a girl is born, I will
bequeath a Ferrari, 2 retail stores, a townhouse, a beach
front villa, and a $2,000,000 bank account.
If a boy is born,
my legacy will be a couple of factories and a $4,000,000
bank account. If twins, they will receive a factory and
$2,000,000 each. However, if there is a miscarriage, what
do you suggest I do?'
At this point, the father, who had remained silent holding
a shot gun, places a hand firmly on the man's shoulder and
tells him ...
'You gonna try again.
I just had a call from a local charity, asking me to donate some of my
clothes to the starving people throughout the world.
I told them to *$^+ off!!
Anybody who fits into my clothes sure as Hell
Last night, one of my best friends and I were
sitting in my living room and I said to her, I never want
to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and
fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug.
She got up, unplugged the computer, and threw out my wine.
She's such a bitch.
DID SOMEBODY SAY