Bear News Beartown News
MARCH 1, 2008




  • It is illegal for restaurants to sell cherry pie la mode on Sundays.
  • In Wichita, a man's mistreatment of his mother-in-law may not be used as grounds for divorce.
  • In Wichita, it is illegal to carry a concealed bean snapper.
  • In Lang, it is illegal to ride a mule down Main Street in August, unless the animal is wearing a straw hat.
  • In Natoma, it is illegal to throw a knife at anyone wearing a striped shirt.



  • State law stipulates that a person is considered sober until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground."
  • It is illegal to remarry the same man four times.
  • In Kentucky it is illegal to carry a concealed weapon more than 6 feet long.


  • In New Orleans, fire trucks are required by law to stop at all red lights.
  • It is considered "simple assault" to bite someone in New Orleans; it is "aggravated assault" if the biter has false teeth.
  • It is against the law to gargle in public.


  • In Portland, it is illegal for men to tickle women under the chin with feather dusters.
  • The most money one can legally win gambling is three dollars.
  • In Rumford, it is illegal for a tenant to bite his/her landlord.

  • In Waterville, it is illegal to blow one's nose in public


  • In Baltimore, it is illegal to wash or scrub sinks, no matter how dirty they get.
  • Every person who has bowled since 1833 may be fined $2 for each offense.
  • In Halethorpe, it is illegal to kiss for more than one second.
  • It's illegal to mistreat oysters.
  • It's illegal to play Randy Newman's "Short People" on the radio.



  • It is illegal to wear a goatee without a license.
  • North Andover prohibits its citizens from carrying "space guns."
  • State legislation forbids dueling with water pistols.
  • In Boston, it is illegal to take a bath unless one has been ordered by a physician to do so.
  • In 1659, the state outlawed Christmas.


  • A state law stipulates that a woman's hair legally belongs to her husband.
  • In Detroit, it is illegal to make love in a car unless it is parked on your property.
  • In Port Huron, the speed limit for ambulances in 20 m.p.h.
  • Under state law, dentists are officially classified as "mechanics."


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