MARCH 1, 2004
THE COUNTRY CORNER
There is no arguing with this cowboy logic. A few years ago, the Sierra Club and the U.S. Forest Service were presenting an alternative to Wyoming ranchers for controlling the coyote population. It seems that after years of the ranchers using the tried and true methods of shooting and/or trapping the predator, the tree-huggers had a "more humane" solution. What they proposed was for the animals to be captured alive, the males castrated and let loose again and the population would be controlled. This was ACTUALLY proposed to the Wyoming Wool and Sheep Grower's Association by the Sierra Club and the USFS . All of the ranchers thought about this amazing idea for a couple of minutes. Finally, an old boy in the back stood up, tipped his hat back and said, "Son, I don't think you understand the problem. Those coyotes ain't breedin' our sheep - they're eatin' 'em"
PROFESSIONAL ENGINEER EXAM
We are sick and tired of hearing
about how dumb people in the South are. We challenge
any so-called smart Yankee to take this exam
administered by the University of Alabama
U S A
After the Superbowl ended:
President Bush called the winning team to tell them what a good job they did.
Al Gore called the losing team to tell them they were robbed.
Bill Clinton called Janet Jackson.
4. A woodcutter has a
chainsaw that operates at 2700 RPM. The
density of the pine trees in the plot to
be harvested is 470 per acre. The plot is
2.3 acres in size. The average tree
diameter is 14 inches. How many Budweisers
will be drunk before the trees are cut
When NASA was preparing for the Apollo Project, it took the
astronauts to a Navajo reservation in Arizona for training. One day, a Navajo grand elder and his son came across the space crew walking among the rocks. The elder, who spoke only Navajo, asked a question. His son
translated for the NASA people: "What are these guys in the
big suits doing?"
One of the astronauts said that they were practicing for a trip to the moon. When his son relayed this comment the Navajo elder got all excited and asked if it would be possible to give to the astronauts a message to deliver to the moon.
Recognizing a promotional opportunity when he saw one, a NASA official accompanying the astronauts said, "Why certainly!" and told an underling to get a tape recorder.
The Navajo elder's comments into the microphone were brief.
The NASA official asked the son if he would translate what his father
had said. The son listened to the recording and laughed profusely.
But he refused to translate.
So the NASA people took the tape to a nearby Navajo village and
played it for other members of the tribe. They too laughed long and
loudly, but also refused to translate the elder's message to the moon.
Finally, an official government translator was summoned. After he finally stopped laughing the translator relayed the message:
"Watch out for these idiots. They have come to steal your land."
first started sending up astronauts, they
Copyright 2000 Claude Dern, All Rights Reserved
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